“The Secret to Keeping Up with Your Kids on the Ski Slopes -- Mom's Ski Clinics - Huffingtonpost.com” plus 1 more |
| The Secret to Keeping Up with Your Kids on the Ski Slopes -- Mom's Ski Clinics - Huffingtonpost.com Posted: 06 Dec 2010 10:32 AM PST The Tucson grandmother was determined to get her groove back -- on skis. But the 65-year-old wasn't doing it for herself. She was doing it for her six grandkids -- all under the age of seven. She wanted to be able to ski with them before they get too old to want to ski with grandma, or she gets too old to ski with them. "You've only got a small window of opportunity," she told me. That's why on this blustery day at The Canyons Resort in Park City, Utah, one of the largest ski resorts in the country, where more than a foot of snow would fall by the end of the day -- the grandmother is out skiing for the first time in more than three years. Along with women from around the country, including me, and a sixty-something friend who encouraged her to come, she has enrolled in former Olympian and ski champion Holly Flanders' clinic for women. Flanders, now in her fifties and a mom of three, is a world-class athlete -- an Olympian who, for a decade, racked up medals racing on the U.S. Ski Team. She started racing at age eight in New Hampshire and didn't hang up her racing skis until her late 20s when she became the public face of Park City Mountain Resort. Holly Flanders Ski School for Moms in Park City, Utah In this group are college instructors and doctors, graphic designers, counselors, stay-at-home moms and full-time volunteers, who range in age from 26 to 65. They come from around the country -- California and Connecticut, Arizona and Washington State, Canada and Utah. Only three of the eleven have participated in a clinic like this before. The instructors also are middle-aged, multi-tasking moms juggling jobs, kids and other responsibilities. "This is a very supportive atmosphere," says veteran instructor Maree Tomczyk, herself the mom of two sons, who has been teaching this clinic since Holly started it some 14 years ago. "It's very relaxed. Guys are much more competitive -- it's all about who gets down first or who takes the biggest jump. Today, you'll find groups and women's clinics like this at large and small resorts across the country from Stowe and Stratton in Vermont to Breckenridge and Aspen in Colorado to Snowbird in Utah to Mammoth Mountain in California and at Jackson Hole in Wyoming. (For a national directory, visit www.outsideadventureguide.com/womens-ski-clinics or www.skilikeawoman.com.) Each program is a little different. There are clinics for snowboarders and skiers, for beginners and experts, with a focus on technique, conquering fear or new equipment testing. (Check the clinics run by expert Jeannie Thoren.) The clinics cost a few hundred dollars for a weekend, considerably more for longer sessions, including those organized by former ski champion Kim Reichhelm. "I see a lot of moms frustrated by skiing," former ski champion Kim Reichhelm says. "They spend all their time taking care of the family and never get to enjoy themselves." The women tell me it's money well spent because it gives them much needed time away from spouses, kids and work as well as challenging themselves physically... And that feels good, they say. "This time away will help me return to the important job of mothering with new energy," suggested one Seattle mom. "There's something else the coaches hope everyone goes home with -- more confidence. "The result is to go back to your life and have more confidence in your everyday life," Flanders explains. "You stand at the top of the hill and you aren't sure you can do it, but you dive in and you do it... If you can accomplish this challenge, you can overcome many other things." Flanders observes that many women seem to lose confidence as soon as they leave the groomed, blue terrain. "My goal is to help them to reach a higher level and when they do it, they enjoy it so much more." I can vouch for that. I'm knee deep in powder on an expert run surrounded by trees that make it tough to turn. Flanders coaches me down, one turn at a time. I only fall once. Yahoo! When I get to the bottom of the run, I feel terrific. I'm covered in snow. The others in the group all congratulate me. I figure we have to grab these moments when we've overcome a challenge -- on the ski hill and in life -- and enjoy them for all they're worth. They make up for all the times that don't go as planned, for all of life's disappointments. There's something to be said for conquering fear -- especially on a mountain with spectacular vistas in every direction surrounded by such a supportive group. "I was willing to do things I wouldn't at the beginning," conceded another member of the group. Me too. Certainly, the snow sports industry is trying to keep women like us on the slopes. Besides camps led and designed by some of the nation's top instructors, resorts now offer other services that have special appeal to women -- yoga classes, spa treatments and women-specific ski and snowboard rentals, observes Michael Berry, president of the National Ski Areas Association. Women, the NSAA notes, account for the majority of beginners, but still don't keep pace with men on the expert slopes. Major snow sports equipment and clothing manufacturers -- from Burton Snowboards to K2 meanwhile are putting increasing focus on women's equipment and clothing. Donna Carpenter, founder and director of Burton's Women's Initiatives, adds that Burton's women's products are not only developed by women for women but also marketed separately. Burton has opened several women's learn-to-ride centers across the country, and continues to promote women-only snowboard camps. "Just remember it you make steps forward and slide back," Flanders told the group before we headed out into the snow. "Allow that to happen. It's a natural progression just keep moving forward and it will come!" Sounds a lot like life, if you ask me. Eileen Ogintz interviews families and experts around the world for her widely syndicated column Taking the Kids ™ and is the creator of www.takingthekids.com She's written seven family travel books, most recently The Kid's Guide; NYC and The Kid's Guide: Cruising Alaska. For more Taking the Kids, visit www.takingthekids.com.
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| Visit with grandparents shouldn't resemble a 'Kids Gone Wild' video - Shelby Star Posted: 06 Dec 2010 08:45 AM PST Q: Help! Whenever our two adult children, their spouses and our four school-age grandchildren (tweenagers, all) visit us, as they did this past Thanks-giving, chaos reigns. The children are nothing short of wild. They run, jump and scatter toys and clothing all over the place, all with much yelling and screaming. They act like they're on vacation at a beach rental, and the parents do little to control the situation. We have tolerated this for some time now because we don't want to create discomfort for our guests. But we've pretty much had it. Do we talk to the parents or should we just discipline when we feel discipline is needed? A: This can be the stickiest of wickets, one that I'm hearing about from an ever-increasing number of grandparents. Apparently, too many of today's parents fail to realize that proper parenting is an expression of love and respect for one's neighbors, including friends and relatives. Lacking such funda-mental social awareness — they have some mass disorder, no doubt — they inflict their little (and sometimes, as in this case, not so little) terrors on everyone who is kind enough to let them in the door. Willie and I laid down the law early on concerning grandchild behavior in our home. We told the kids that two rules prevailed: First, when in Rome do as the Romans do, and when the Romans come to you, do as the Romans do. Second, it is our job to spoil, your job to discipline; do not do our job and we won't have to do yours. That pretty much sums up the grandparent/parent relationship. Thankfully, our kids were and are still on board with our expectations. We certainly aren't draconian, but things like running, jumping on furniture, loud noises and disobedience (in any form) are not allowed. Those clear understandings make for much better visits for adults and children alike. Were I in your shoes, I would take this issue up with the parents. If you react to the grandchildren's behavior out of the proverbial blue, and especially given the unfortunate precedents that have been set, you are likely to run afoul of parental protectiveness. Furthermore, you are not and should not be responsible for the discipline of your grandchildren. Their parents are responsible, and they should accept that obligation. Doing so is a matter of respect for you not to mention good guest etiquette — a word in danger of extinction. Assuming you and Grandma are on the same page — Caution! Do not proceed unless that condition is satisfied! — talk to the parents. Tell them what bothers you and what your expectations are. No need to be critical, mind you. No need to imply that you don't approve of their parenting. Explain that the older one gets, the less tolerant one becomes of child chaos. It's true, unless one is blessed with hearing loss. The parents, in turn, should convey your expectations, in no uncertain terms, to the grandchildren before they get in the car to come to your house and again in the driveway before everyone gets out of the car. They should make a further commitment to you that enforcement will not be in your court. And it really doesn't matter whether or not the parents agree with your expectations. They should back you unconditionally. That's one way parents teach children respect for adult authority.
Family psychologist John Rosemond answers parents' questions on his website at www.rosemond.com.
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